Andy Rooney: Too Ballyhooed

Andy Rooney was a cantankerous old sod with eponymous eyebrows and a wiseacre-delivery that became ever-more grating over the decades. Born on January 14th of 1919, the grumpy old Andy was an aged version of grumpy young Andy.

Happy Birthday, Andy Rooney!

Beloved by millions who hung on through every second of 60 Minutes for 33 years just to see his crabby meanderings at the end, Mr. Rooney retired from the Sunday night CBS New show in late 2011. He died a month later. The dude's genes were sound -- he lived to age 92. His curmudgeonly soliloquies were less laudable. He often sounded like a spoiled, buxom redhead whining over warm champagne -- and he didn't care. Indeed, he took pleasure in writing and speaking "the truth" and was mystified that anyone should find it less than mere, warmed-over snark.

Mr. Rooney's family life was imaginably more dignified, warm and pleasant than his on-screen persona. Living in the rarefied climes of upscale Connecticut and New York neighborhoods, he and his wife raised four children who eventually followed their father's footsteps into the media industry. In addition to news writing and punditry, the crusty old gadfly penned 16 books, including The Story of the Stars and Stripes which reflected his experiences as an Army journalist during World War II.

Birthday Gift for Andy Rooney?

A huge fan of the New York Giants and a season ticket holder for decades, Mr. Rooney would have to love a toaster that burnishes the football team's logo on bread slices. Never one to hold back in with his disgust for unnecessary appliances and newfangled gadgets, Andy may set aside his consternation for NFL Protoast Toasters

The foundation of a breakfast for champions, Giants-logo emblazoned slices of warm, toasty bread may be the comfort in life Mr. Rooney needed to make his public appearance more engaging. Scrambled eggs, a nice slice of fresh tomato and a mug of green tea could have helped, as well.